I'm sitting here at home listening to mediocre music on Fuse TV and feeling like I'm having a panic attack since Todd just came in and bitched me out for not having all of my music off of the computer. The fucking computer that he's not even supposed to be using. I hate him.

I want my own computer, my own job so I can have my own money, the courage to say "Fuck you Todd, you're a fat douche", the ability to feel like I'm worth something to someone, and the ability to stop myself from becoming more pathetic than I'm already coming. It's all because of the play, because of Todd, and because of my own stupidity... Fuckin' hell...

I'm sitting her at home listening to mediocre music on Fuse TV and feeling like I'm having a panic attack since Todd just cam in and bitched me out for not having all of my music off of the computer... and I don't like it... I feel like I want to just break down and cry right now for no reason... I feel light-headed...